Then God Gave Me These To Hold On To.

Picture One: Standing in the sand on the Oregon Coast. Jesus came walking up beside me, and I could see that His strides in the sand were bigger than mine. He scooped up my hand and asked, "Would you be my girl?"  He fills me with more love than anyone ever did, how could I even hesitate?! How could I refuse Him? He leads me by still waters, He comforts me. His love for me has NO bounds.


Picture Two: I saw a marble courtyard, and covering the floor of the courtyard was warm rich blood, about two inches deep. Then people slowly started filling the courtyard, little children curiously reached down and stuck their fingers in the blood, then everyone reached down and washed their hands in it. Before I knew it, Blood was smeared all over their arms, faces, legs, and clothes.
Suddenly, the courtyard was completely empty, but the traces of people were still there.  I then left and went walking through the streets of Jerusalem. The walls and houses were COVERED in smears of the blood. Small hand prints covered everything, the roads had blood on them, the animals, the temples, the jails. I left Jerusalem and came home to Salem Oregon, and it was the same! Blood covered everything, and everybody!! We couldn't get away from it, nor did we want to.

So it is the same with the blood of the Lamb.

(Sometimes, God speaks to me in strange/intense pictures)

Picture Three:  So, Jesus and I were sitting in the grass, on a dark starry night.  There was a warm, comforting bonfire between us.  "Give it to me." He whispered.  I closed my eyes and started to let go, but I felt, like, out of control. I started to hesitate and grabbed for my heart! I wouldn't let go! Immediately, He reached for my hand and held it away from my chest. "Let go child... Give it to me." He smiled.  "I'm trying." I told Him. 
Slowly, we both lowered my hand, and my heart area was exposed. Then Jesus did something I would have never imagined. He slowly reached into my chest, grabbed my heart, and pulled it out. The flames flickered in our faces. We met eyes and I realized that I wasn't breathing. Jesus held my heart in Him big Daddy palm. He steadied and gave me His breath in my lungs. My heart pounded in His hands, beating with all of my dreams, secrets and ideas. He held it so gently, so lovingly. He looked into me, and smiled with so much love, how could I have ever not been moved by Him! I then realized that I was totally naked before my God.


How does God speak to you? What has He been whispering in your ear?

Sore Fingers Are Pleasant Company

Have you ever heard (or maybe experienced first hand) of those crazy devoted obsessed musicians, who play so hard and long that their fingers break open and bleed?  Estupido. You are reading from one who is typing with those fingers.
I recently was given a classic wideneck acoustic Guild Guitar. 

God is so crazy sometimes. He totally knew how I felt about those (only love) and He wanted to bless me with one... or rather have someone else give up theirs for me. Sacrifice. But isn't that what He, God, is all about? Where would I be without sacrifice? HopeLESS.
Where would you be?
Answer:______________

Sacrifice gives me hope. Hope is a vision. "The vision" of hope is different for everyone: better endings, restoration of broken families, freedom, breaking cycles, life, finding true love, making change. The vision can be as simple as a Super Bowl, a birthday, a wedding, a child... a sunrise that you never thought you would be alive to see. These are the visions of hope... 

And Hope is Real. 



This guitar has given me hope of becoming a better, stronger, crazy, devoted, obsessed musician. Who would have thought that such a gift could start turning the cogs and wheels inside of my melon.

In summary: Guitar-sacrifice-hope-vision-sore fingers-musician :]

Food for thought.

Seasons Are Changing, Stars Are Falling, and Waves Are Crashing Down.

  There is a time for everything,
   and a season for every activity under the heavens:

  a time to be born and a time to die,
   a time to plant and a time to uproot,
  a time to kill and a time to heal,
   a time to tear down and a time to build,
  a time to weep and a time to laugh,
   a time to mourn and a time to dance,
  a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
   a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
  a time to search and a time to give up,
   a time to keep and a time to throw away,
  a time to tear and a time to mend,
   a time to be silent and a time to speak,
  a time to love and a time to hate,
   a time for war and a time for peace.

Every season in our lives carries new adventures, new people, new feelings, and new trials.  This new season I find myself thrown into, is a season of leaning.  God is taking me away to be alone with Him, to lean on Him, to eat His food, and drink His living water. Ready. Set. Go.

What season are you in? Food for thought.

Northbound On the Puget Sound

"Why do seagulls fly over the sea? because if they flew over the bay they would be called bagels."

Road trip! What was your first road trip like? Where did you go? What would you do differently?
For the record, I have lived in Oregon my whole life, and visited Idaho for a few weeks. Never had I been anywhere else.
Washington was on my horizon, and with my two friends, Anna ad Cara, we planned a road trip to visit our dear friend Kyle. We left Friday and were able to spend the whole weekend with him and his amazing family.

 One night for dinner we trekked to Suquamish, a small town south and not far from Kingston, for pizza. Next door to Bella Luna, the pizza place, was a small,colorful, warm Native American shop.  Native American people and their culture hold a special place in my heart. I had the privilege of meeting a lady who belongs to the Black Foot Indian tribe. Though a little crazy from many years of alcohol, she was such a joy to talk to and get to know.  She owned the small shop that was filled to the brim with Native American artifacts, furs, clothes, beads, jewelry, feathers, etc. She and I talked for a little while and I really like her.  Before I departed from the store, I grinned big and told her "May God bless you."  She excitedly jerked her head around to look me in the eyes, and smiled a toothless grin saying "Thank you. May He bless you too. Thank you sweetheart, thank you for coming into my shop today."  She came close to me and whispered "If these other customers weren't in here, then we could have prayed together." I giggled and told her, "Well we can step outside and pray a quick prayer if you want?"  She shook her head and hands and turning around to go back to her chair she said, "Nope sorry hun, I gotta go eat my lunch." Dont forget, she was a little crazy ;)
I decided to pray for her instead of with her :]

On Sunday after church, Kyle took us on a ferry ride on the Puget Sound. We sailed to the very ends of the earth!! or maybe just the shores of a small town called Edmunds.

This was one of the best moments of my short life!!

 I discovered just how much I love ferry rides!!! Sailing on a massive boat, with the wind blowing so hard you can lean into it.....
I'm a sailor now! I sail!!

The Saturday night that we were there, Kyle had a benefit concert for his trip to Cambodia. I had the pleasure of meeting a his best friends.  They were awesome, and I am blessed to now be able to call them my friends.
Our trip flew by, and we were sad to come home, but made it home safe. We could not have made it there and back without those doughnuts. Thank you Christopher Mcfeteragde, your awesome sauce.

Be wise, and sanitize!!

Northbound, Where The Wild Things 'Are' Found.

I'm going on a journey, northbound.
I pray its the adventure I've searched for but never found.

Moose, bears, wolves with thick gray hair.
Northern lights,
New moons, 
Navy blue long johns.

That's just the way things are..
Oh, and there's gonna be black bears in my
Backyard.

Haiku...

Wind speaks of my song
Northern lights dance on my eyes
Wolf friend at my side.


You've probably guessed it by now, but I just really want to say it.

I'm Going To Alaska....

I hardly believe it, but this is real. I leave May 15, and return Oct 15.  Port Alsworth is where I'll be. A town of 150 people. 

Travelers come from all over to stay at a lodge up there.  I will be working at the lodge, cleaning guest houses and the like. 

For some reason, I feel like...

This is the beginning of the rest of my life.

My whole childhood is filled with dreams of travel, it all starts here.

"Sometimes I see myself as a child in a rain storm, running around, trying to catch all the drops in her mouth. I long for my adventures to be like the raindrops the child saves, and not those that crash to the ground."

Shakespeare wrote this actually, I just like to adapt it to myself. Hehe

Here is one last quote before I head off to sleep...

This is one of my faves :]

"We live in a world full of beauty, charm, and adventure. There is no end to the adventures that we can have, if only we seek them with our eyes wide open."  ~ Jawaharlal Nehru 

I'm excited to meet new people, see new sights, and hear new sounds.

These are the gifts of being Northbound.

Y'all sleep sweet now! :]

"Look Up At the Stars. Can You Count Them?"

The last night of the Rising (a service at YWAM that they offer to the public every Tuesday night) God gave me another revelation of who He is.
We were reading the story of Abraham, and God had made a promise to Abraham that he would be the father of nations. "Look up at the sky Abe, see all of those stars? Count them if you can... the number of your children and grandchildren and great grandchildren will be the same as the stars in sky." 

Abraham waited and waited for God to fulfill His promise. When God blessed Abraham with a son, you can  only imagine how excited Abraham was! "Finally God gave me this which I have prayed for!" 

You can only imagine how Abraham must have felt when God said, "Go, take your son, and give to me as a sacrifice." 

So is DTS for me......

God promised me that He would take me places, that I would go to Thailand. He then, took it back, to test me..... Thailand is my son Isaac.

God has beautiful things in store for me, He has my life planned out for me. I just need to continue to give my dreams and hopes up to Him who gave them to me.  

Gen 15:5- The Lord took Abraham outside and said, "look up at the stars, count them if you can." Then He said to him, "That is how many children you will have."

When God saw that Abraham trusted Him enough to kill his own son, He stopped Abraham. God gave him his son, his dreams, his hopes and desires, when He saw Abrahams faithfulness.

God keeps His promises.

The Toe That Wasn't Broken Anymore.

Imagine waking up everyday, walking into the kitchen and being surrounded by all the soft, warm, delicious Starbucks pastries you could ever eat.....

Welcome to my past three months :] 

I was reminded of this today as I was in line at Starbucks. You see, during my DTS, Starbucks always gave us a ton of pastries for free everyday. Ahh the life of a missionary.

It snowed today :] I feel like the snow brings hope to me when I need it most. Somehow I don't feel so alone when snow if falling next to me.  One night during DTS it started snowing, and it was seriously the most beautiful snow moment I have ever known.  

Ok, so, I plan on telling you a story. A very true story about healing, broken toes, and sushi.  Before my DTS I honestly would not have believed this could happen. 

I was skipping through the cafeteria, its a very looong cafeteria mind you. At the end of the cafeteria was a table (surprise surprise) and the table thought that I would stop before impact.  What actually happened instead was, I hit the table and broke my toe on its leg, rude.  I'm not gonna lie, I was actually pretty excited because it was my first broken bone ever. After about a day though, it really stared to give me problems. My friend Roman.....

Yeah, this guy :] Roman would not get off my back about having someone pray over it  for healing. I didn't want to because I thought God wouldn't do that.  I guess I didn't want God to look bad if we asked Him to heal me and He didn't. 

Word of advice: this is a very stupid thing to think. God made my toe, and He can do WHATEVER He dang well pleases with it.... I didn't need to "cover His back."

 He's God.

 With or without my obedience.  

All day, Roman would say "Hey Beth, you should come up to the prayer chapel tonight, everyone will pray over your toe. C'mon Beth! Just come try it! Everyone would love to pray for you!"

For the sake of settling Roman down, I decided that I would make the long trek up to the chapel on the hill that night. It hurt. Broken toes are no cakewalk.  10 p.m. came, the darkness outside helped my quick exit to go unnoticed.   I think I was also afraid of my pride getting bruised, because I had made such a big deal about how cool it was to finally break something.  As I climbed, I ironically met Roman coming down from the prayer chapel, "Beth! I knew you would come! Hurry! I told everyone what happened and they are waiting for you!"  Great.... we entered the chapel, and I retold my story of how it happened and which toe it was. Everyone gathered 'round and put their hands on my foot. I kept my eyes open to watch.  Ten minutes went by, and nothing happened. Then, persistent Roman put his hand over my heart and prayed

"God would you please just soften this heart.  Please just soften Beth's heart so that she would receive Your healing."

It did. I cant even explain to you how this happened or felt except that, it felt new and true. Almost immediately my toe started shooting with pain. It burned and felt like it needed to pop! I mentioned this to the group and they prayed even more. Just as soon as it started, it ceased. Roman looked up and said, "Beth, I think you should get up and walk around." I did and nothing hurt, at all. Then Addy yelled "Beth run and dance around!" I did. My baby toe felt totally normal. It was straight, pink, and healed! Roman just started laughing. "Beth, God doesn't do that.... Yes He Does!!" 

That was one of my memorable miracles from DTS.  Go God :]

P.S. Thank you Roman for pushing me and pulling up that hill (metaphorically speaking) I would not have gone up if you hadn't been so convincing.   

Oh! I really didn't have anything to say about sushi. I mean, sushi is really good, and I learned to make it during DTS, but it had nothing to do with my story. I feel like if you say that you have a sushi story, people will instantly want to read it. I mean, hey, who doesn't love a good sushi story ;]